Neglected?

I know, it's been pretty quiet around my blog home since going back to Facebook.  But, really, I just don't have much I'm willing to talk about.  I'm kinda in one of those "seasons" where it seems it's better if I say nothing at all.  I'll choose to learn instead of speak.  If that makes sense.  Don't get me wrong, I still talk all the time (how could I not! haha).  Just not about certain things.  That's a stupid comment and seems vague and like I want you to ask but am not going to say it.  Like I'm on a fishing expedition.  But, I'm not.  Sometimes it's just best to leave things unsaid.  And offer thoughts, worries, joys, troubles, etc up to the Lord in prayer.  He's best equipped to handle them anyway. :)

I know that paragraph will probably spur emails in my inbox asking if I'm ok.  Please, believe me.  I'm fine.  Really.

Isn't it amazing how when we choose to be silent we can hear His voice so much clearer?  It never ceases to amaze me how much we miss out on when we are too busy being loud.  If we insist on making incessant noise, we can't expect to hear His voice.  He speaks softly for a reason.  So that we will be still, let the rest of the noise fade, and just give Him our full attention.  Just as we would a new lover.  He longs for you.  Do you long for Him?  I do.  And I'm in a receiving mode.  But in order to receive I have to give.  And, right now, I'm giving my silence as an offering.  Please, don't mistake it for anything else.  I'm not growing complacent.  I'm not being rude.  I'm not depressed.  I can't say that I am always joyful right now though.  Cuz it's just not true.  I have moments of joy, moments of introspection, moments of anger, moments of whatever else.  There are a lot of changes going on right now, and I just need a bit to soak it all in and learn what the Lord wants me to learn in all of it.  In growing, there are growing pains. I've been noisy, and now I'm choosing to be quiet.

He's been preparing me for this season for quite some time, and I'm so thankful for being in the spiritual place I'm in now instead of where I was a year ago.  But I can't say I'm perfect.  I've spouted off when I shouldn't have and kept quiet when I should have spoken up.  I'm a human and my human flaws are evident.  Thankfully, His grace covers it all.  And His joy comes in the morning, over and over and over again.  :)  He's a fantastic Daddy, isn't He?  Makes me smile whenever I think of Him.

Hmm..what else..I do have a new song that I love.  I know, go figure!  Here's a video of it..


Lyrics:

Gorgeous Face
Your face is what I long to see
Your eyes, piercing the depths of me


Come quickly, my Father
Your child is here waiting
Show me Your face
No more veil’s covering me
Burn me with pure love
So I can see
My Lord, my Lord


Awesome splendor
Glorious majesty
Faithful Father
Gorgeous face


© 2009 Rick Pino and Kari Jobe

Another cool thing..school is out for J and I on Tuesday!!  Maybe earlier if we decide to do extra work.  I can't wait for summer break!  Yeeehaw!

I'll leave you with this:

NOW FAITH is the assurance (the confirmation, ^[a]the title deed) of the things [we] hope for, being the proof of things [we] do not see and the conviction of their reality [faith perceiving as real fact what is not revealed to the senses].  Hebrews 11:1 AMP

Take care of yourself.  Don't forget to take time to listen.  Love you.

We'll chat soon..

Ahhh Facebook, how I love thee

So happy to be back on Facebook, I can't even tell you! Dang, I missed my buddies!!  I didn't miss all of the dramatic junk..but oh well.  I'll just focus on the good. :)

Anyway, if you get the chance, read Isaiah 42-43 in The Message. Um, amazing. I was all sorts of into that yesterday. Still am today, but you know what I mean. :)

I had a donut today. EEEEH! Donut, coffee, banana, strawberry. Yeah, just one strawberry. It was the size of 2. It was HUGE. I liked it. :)

How do YOU spell donut? Doughnut? Donut? I like donut. Doughnut seems too formal. And I don't feel formal when I eat donuts. I feel free when I eat donuts.  :) And, just for the record, I don't usually even want donuts. But when the craving hits..oooh baby. "Me..Love..Donuts!" (<--cookie monster voice) I like to say "donut" a lot right now, can you tell?  Sugar high!!!!!!!!!!

Getting ready to take Ash and Bradee down to the fundraiser car wash for their school. They have to be there for two hours. Then back here to get ready for the get together later. I have to vacuum. That takes a long time. About an hour. Stupid, stupid dog hair.

Fake people annoy me..just by the by. By the by, what a weird saying. Who came up with that. ANyway..if someone doesn't truly care, why bother asking? I mean seriously. Just shut the mother up and go ooze your fake junk on someone else. Just thought I'd add that in, for good measure.

The weather is GORGEOUS outside today! Oh my goodness, I am SO excited to be able to be outside whenever I want to! Without a jacket! Good weather, pleeeeease last. Well, have a wonderful Saturday everyone! I super love you and am so glad you are alive. Make the most of your life! ((hugs))

We'll chat soon..

Countdown to Facebook

I have The Final Countdown song stuck in my head as I think of the last few hours of my Facebook fast.



Kinda funny..haha..Wow those boys were manly. LOL! Ok, enough of that.

Woke up this morning feeling light. Gosh it was nice. The heaviness of the past few days was gone. Thank the Lord. And thank you my friends for praying. The enemy sucks. We all know that. But the Lord is KING.

Watched my friends little son, Kenneth, this morning for a few hours. He was so much fun! Very well behaved and super happy. Was nice to see his Momma for awhile, too. They live in Pocatello so I don't get to see them very often. I'm hoping to be able to go up again for her birthday in June. I did last year and we had SO MUCH FUN! We shall see. :0)

The sun is out in all its glory today. The breeze is light. The air is perfect. I'm guessing somewhere around high 60's/low 70's but I'm not sure. Just feels great.

Ash and I are gonna start painting her room today. The color? Island Orange. It looks like .. well .. an orange. :0) She likes it. And it will brighten up her room quite a bit! haha Should be fun. I love to paint.

We will have Bradee with us all weekend! Also, this weekend we have basketball/dinner/games get together, a sleepover with friends, a fundraiser carwash for the girls' class, a graduation party to set up for and then attend, and maybe even a birthday party if I can get back in town early enough..also a softball practice and drama practice starts back up as well. Not quite sure how it will all fit in, but it will. And we will have a blast with almost all of it!

Well you guys have a wonderful Thursday. I'll see you on Facebook at midnight!!! Oh, and btw, unlike my magnificent TV fast which produced great things in me..the Facebook fast sucked from beginning to end. In the first few days I learned that I was using it as too much of an outlet for feelings instead of taking them to the Lord. Great, fixed that. The rest of the days just sucked because I spent a lot of time fellowshipping on FB, and studying the word to share and discuss with my friends, etc..and when I wasn't on FB, I didn't do those things. So, if anything my walk suffered a bit. So, what did I learn? My Facebook addiction isn't all bad. Just needs to be kept in line. Much like everything else in life.

Love you, we'll chat soon..

Before The Day

Jen over at The Days I'll Remember posted this song on her blog this morning. Um, I fell in love. I've sent it out to pretty much everyone I can through email. But, I thought I'd post it here, too. Thanks, Jen! I'll post the lyrics, too.  My video is different than hers, I found one that had an awesome thing written on it before the music starts.


Title: Before The Day
Artist: NewSong

Last night when I was sleeping
You were watching over me
While I dreamt about tomorrow
You knew my every need
Now another day is waiting
For me to make it through
And there's no way that I could face it without You
Before the day slips away
I want to stop and say
I love You I love You
Before the world rushes in again
I want to stop and say there's none above You
There's none above You
I'll just be still and know You are God
Be still and know You are God
There's something about the morning
The stillness of it all
It calms my heart to hear You
When You gently call
Here I am in Your presence
Where I long to be
Alone with You in the silence
Bring down Your love and Your mercy
Whisper softly to me

Victory is on the way :)

Sometimes the storm knocks you down.  Sometimes the fight seems too hard.

But, when the storm rages, work with the gusts, don't quit! Even in the storm, there is beauty. Are you willing to see it? It might require a change in perspective. Instead of letting the storm knock you down, use it to gain strength. Endurance.

The wind might beat at your back, and the rain might pelt your face. Use the wind to soar, and the rain to cleanse.

Grow, prepare and be ready. So that when the sun breaks through the clouds and the rainbow spreads across the sky, you will be ready to fully embrace the glorious moment of long awaited victory.

The best rainbows come after the worst storms.   It's coming. Can you feel it?  Look UP!

The truth is, when you forget (or refuse) to look up..you miss out on seeing The Helping Hand stretched out for you.

 

To Know Your Heart

Even when you know the storm is coming, it still hits harder than you'd expected. But the peace that comes, when you allow it, is beyond understanding. My heart is beyond heavy and the tears seem to be never ending. But my soul is soaring on wings of eagles. Which is hard, even for me, to believe.

I got in the car today after church and sat in silence for quite awhile. Just listening for my Father. Feeling His embrace. Drowning out all that surrounded me and just being nothing more than silent in His presence. Then felt the Lord urge me to turn the radio on. I did, and this song was just starting. I've never heard it before. It was perfect. Thank you, Father. For loving on me so completely. For comforting me beyond what any human can offer. For being my Friend Who sticks closer than a brother. For being my Shelter. For hiding me in the shadow of Your Wing. I love you, always. With YOU all things work together for my good. You've never failed me, so I won't doubt in You now.



Love you guys. Oh, and Happy Mother's Day. You are beautiful, adored, cherished and valued. Not even one of you is alone. Even if you feel that way. He is always with you.

We'll chat soon..

The Cure for Worry!

 Pastor Laurie does it again..or shall I say the Lord does it through Pastor Laurie.  That's more accurate!  Willing vessels are my most favorite thing ever!  Anyway, this devo hit my inbox just as I was worrying about the day and complaining about my shoulder pain..wondering how I was gonna go scrub floors and tubs.  Thankfully, my God is bigger than any shoulder pain..and He will give me strength I can't find on my own. :0) 

Also, I love that he used the word "perspective"!  You all know that's my new favorite word.  Dang it's an easy one to say, hard one to apply.  But, I'm getting better.  It seems I'm constantly reminding myself, "perspective".  And every time I do, it's like hearing it for the first time!  LOL  Oh yeah, perspective!  :0)  Anyway, I highlighted the sentence where he says that..for your viewing pleasure.  heehee  Love you!  Have a GREAT Friday!


FRIDAY, MAY 7, 2010
The Cure for Worry
Greg Laurie

From the ends of the earth, I cry to you for help when my heart is overwhelmed. Lead me to the towering rock of safety.
— Psalm 61:2


There are things in life that scare us, even terrify us sometimes. We have concerns about the future, about our health, about our family, and about our finances. The list of things that cause us to be filled with anxiety goes on and on. So I have a suggestion for you: the next time you are tempted to worry, pray.

I worry, and I don't admit that with pride. Worry can be a sin in which we are failing to trust God. Philippians 4:6–7 gives us this solution for worry:
Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God's peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.


Notice these verses don't say that as you pray about everything, God will take your problems away. Rather, it says that God's "peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus." Maybe God will take your problem away. Or maybe He won't. But what will happen is that you will gain perspective as you see God for who He is and your problem for what it is.

If you have a big God, then you have a relatively small problem. But if you have a big problem, then it might be that you have a small God. You are not seeing God in His glory and what He can do. The psalmist wrote, "From the ends of the earth, I cry to you for help when my heart is overwhelmed . . ." (Psalm 61:2). When I cry out to God, He gives me His peace and His strength. And He will do the same for anyone who will call on Him.

Matt & Laura's Haiti video

Can't even begin to tell you how proud I am of them. They make differences in the lives of many, daily. And get out of their comfort zone to do so. I wish I could bring all of those kids home and love on them forever. And, I wish videos of kids in the USA would show such joy. Our kids really don't know how good they have it..neither do we.

Anyway, I thought you all might enjoy to see the video since you were my prayer buddies while they were there! Enjoy.

Sunshine, sweat, and yelling.

Yup, woke up to SUNSHINE. Will it last? Even an hour? I hope so. Yesterday we had minutes of sunshine, hours of dark nasty wind, bursts of snow, hail, rain, and just all around muck. Yesterday's weather was like a woman's emotions when going through PMS. ..Oh, and just a side note, we do all realize that it's mid MAY and I used the word SNOW. Right?

First song that popped up on my player when I signed in was Zac Brown Band: Chicken Fried.  LOVE IT!  Such a fun band.  Now, it's Toby Keith: I Wanna Talk About Me.  Love that song, too!  How funny!  Must be why it's on my playlist.  haha  Anyway, it reminds me of when we lived in Texas.  The song had just come out.  And our friends son, Brian, just LOVED it and loved to sing it whenever it came on.  So cute.  Every time I hear that song I think of Brian and all the laughs our families had together.  You'd think they still live there the way I talk, right?  No, they live 30 minutes away from me.  I see them once a year, maybe.  Sad!  I should work on that.

After last weeks Biggest Loser episode where they did the 5K run, Chris told me that he wanted to do that with me the next time we went to the gym.  After my whole falling issue we didn't go that Friday, or Monday.  (Remember, I literally could barely walk on Monday.)  So, last night was the night!  I was like..oh man, why am I doing this.  Now..5K really isn't that big a deal.  It works out to 3.1 miles (thank you Google)..I usually do 5 miles on the elliptical. (yes, we did elliptical, not treadmill..I wonder how that changes things?) But, as soon as I got on the elliptical last night my legs and hips were already on FIRE.  My body was like, "ARE YOU FLIPPING KIDDING ME?!?!"  At 1.6 miles I looked over to Chris and told him, "I'm not gonna make it."  And in usual fashion, my husband yells, in the gym, because he still (at 34 years of age) can't figure out that when you have earphones in you don't need to speak so loud..."WHAT?  HOW MUCH TIME DO YOU HAVE LEFT? 30 SECONDS?  YOU CAN'T MAKE IT?"  I almost punched him off of his elliptical machine.  In my head I saw him flying through the air.  I told him, "You're yelling again."  "WHAT???  ISN'T IT JUST 30 SECONDS LEFT?  YOU SAID YOU WERE DOING 30 MINUTES?"  I said, "You're yelling."  He then pulls out his earphones.  Jeez, thanks.  Novel concept.  Turns out he doesn't realize that I set my timer to show how much time I have left, not how much time I've done.  I don't feel like explaining it, so I just turn my face away from him.  And just for the record, I was going 45 minutes, not 30.  So regardless, he made no sense.  Ok, I wasn't really going to tell you all of that.  I love my husband.  HAHA  Anyhoo, Then at 1.74 miles I thought, I am going to DIE.  It was SOO HOT IN THERE!  I really need to get that manager to crank the A/C.  74* for a gym is like working out on the face of the sun.  And it's totally humid in there with peoples nasty butt sweat.  Moving on...well, wait.  Staying put for a sec.  When we first started going there it was nice and cool.  And, no butt sweat.  What happened?   OK..NOW moving on...so at 1.74 miles I decided I wasn't going to look at the progress screen anymore for awhile.  I got sucked into my Hoarders show (GREAT SHOW) and next time I looked I was at 2.33 miles.  Sweet!  I look over at Chris and say, "Did you say it was 3.1 miles or 3.6 miles?"  "WHAT??"  "Did you say it was 3.1 or 3.6 miles?"  "THREE POINT ONE"  Again, everyone on the gym looks over.  They feel my pain, I'm sure.  Well, actually, they are probably used to it.  Because as he watches whatever show he's got on he laughs just as he would at home..makes comments on the show in a very loud voice..it's actually kind of funny.  Just not when he's making it sound like I can't make it 30 seconds on a machine.  Then all the funny runs out.  I'm rambling again.  I know.  SO..I finished my 3.1 with lots of time to spare so I kept going..because I wanted to finish watching Hoarders.  So..in the end I made it 4 miles and went for an hour.  I usually make it 5 miles in just a little over an hour..so I'm running, in theory, about 5 minutes behind that.  Which means I need to get into the gym more.  I'll deal with that later.  Actually, the last 15 minutes on the machine I went super slow..so maybe if I'd given it my all, I would have gotten 5 miles.  Yeah, I'll go with that. haha

Well, that's really all I had to share.  Except that our Cinco De Mayo dinner was super yummy.  And Chris has decided that he will have the left over meat with eggs this morning.  The kids and I almost threw up.  But, I do realize that many people like cow and eggs.  That's fine.  I don't.  I hope he super enjoys it!  He's up sleeping right now.  Got up to take Ash to the bus stop, but must not have had a meeting because when I woke up he was back in bed with me!  He's such a sweetie.  I just love him.  Even when he's yelling at me in the gym..on accident, of course.

Love you!  Have a wonderful day.  Remember, Jesus LOVES you with a love that is limitless.  His love never runs out, or walks away if it gets too hard.  And He is forever faithful to you..without fault..He loves you because He WANTS to.  He's not forced to.  He CHOSE you.  He WANTS you!  You are the apple of His eye.

We'll chat soon...

Cinco De Mayo!!

Yay! I just love this holiday and am proud to be part of my husbands heritage..even if only by marriage. :0) J told my Mom a few weeks back, "I'm not sure I want to be part Mexican. Even though I really like Mexicans." My Mom asks him why and says he should be very proud of who he is. J replies, "Well...I can't speak spanish." awwww it was so sweet. He did learn a little bit last year and will start learning more in school this coming year. I told him Mommy can't teach you many words that are good for you to know, so you better wait for school..haha Chris should be able to teach him everything he needs to know, but he's forgotten most everything he learned. Bad!

We've had the carne asada marinating since Monday afternoon (some say to only marinate for 2 hours, no more than 24..we don't agree). I'm in the process of making green sauce for dipping...and we've decided against making our own tortillas today. Just not enough time. Too many other things going on. But we will imagine them. The last ones we made turned out really well!

Well, enjoy your day! We plan to enjoy ours. Yahoo!

Love ya

We'll chat soon...

Help! I've fallen..but I got up.

Our Golden Retriever has serious separation issues. When we leave, she digs to try to get out..not even near a gate..that would take too much brainy activity. She just literally goes crazy and starts maniacly digging and drooling and shaking and running. So, we can't leave her outside. And we can't leave her in the dog kennel because she does the same thing in there that she does outside. So we get home and she is sopping wet with drool. Gross. SO, we leave her in the garage when we leave. That worked well for awhile cuz I think she kinda figured we were inside, not gone. Then at some point she figured it out and started flipping out..trying to eat herself into the house by destroying the doorframe. Stellar. So, we now baracade the door. We put the kennel in front of half of it and then the baby gate on the other half of it so she can't get at it. It actually works really well. She just walks around with my slipper in her mouth and waits for us to get home. Sweet!

All of THAT to say..I had it all set up in the garage the other day (Friday) and noticed that I had forgotten to put her bed down on the concrete for her to lay on. And, J was bringing out her bowl of water and I didn't want him to have to climb over the gate. So, I went over the gate. Literally. The tip of my shoe caught on the handle of the mop that was wedged in between the wall and gate and I went flying. In the nano seconds between standing and laying, I thought, I could keep trying to regain balance, or I could just fall. I thought, screw it, I don't even care. And, I fell. Full force onto the ground. Pounding my entire right side into the concrete. Probably wasn't the best idea. But, I'm tired people. There comes a point in life where you just decide, screw it, I don't want to fight anymore. And that was the moment I had in the garage. I just didn't feel like trying to fight against something that was going to happen, in some form, anyway. So, I jacked up my shoulder pretty good. Shooting pains everywhere. But, it's all better now. I got a nasty concrete burn (like a rug burn) with a hideous bruise all around it and then on my thigh I have a huge bruise in the shape of the outside of my fist (think donut)..which my thigh firmly landed upon. Of course, my hips always hurt (thank you Hartmann family tree) so this only made that lil problem about a million times worse. No biggee.

So then on Sunday, Amber, Val and I were supposed to go hiking. But between the weather and my "fall", the hike was out. This was going to be the repeat of the death hike I did last year with Val. Some of you will remember that hike. It is straight from the pit of hell, but so worth it. So, I told Amber I thought I'd be fine to just walk on flat ground..just not ready to go push myself up the hill for hours on end. SO..she came over and we walked..and walked..and walked. I wanted to finish a loop that Tierney and I had started a few months back. And, we did! My hips were hurting pretty good by half way through..and when we got done they really hurt. Some would have stopped. I told my body to suck it up. I was busy. We ended up walking over 7 miles. I can hardly walk yesterday night and today. Cool, right? LOL My poor, poor hips. One day they will realize that I'm not giving in. Or, they'll win and I'll get a hip replacement..whatever. Either way, I'm gonna keep walkin.

So, back to Friday. We were getting ready to leave because Ash was gone for the weekend to Montana for Bible Quiz, and J was going to my parents' house for the weekend. AND, Chris was taking me out for my belated Birthday dinner and outing over the weekend (specifically that night). So, it was super cool to destroy myself just as we are getting ready to walk out the door, right!?! LOL Chris said, "Babe, maybe we should just stay home." I said, to hell with that. We are going OUT. Us Mother's have to take it where we can get it! We stopped and got some bandaids and a huge bottle of ibuprofin. I took a bunch and felt better. See, honey!?! I'm totally ready to go out! ;) We had a blast. Yummy dinner, great movie (Date Night..an objectional moment but otherwise great), walk around the mall for our breakfast the next day (Mrs. Powell's Cinnamon Rolls) and a stop by The Cheesecake Factory for our to-go desserts. Then home to overdose on Ibuprofin relax.

Saturday we laid around totally lazy..oozed around like beached whales as we ate the cinnamon rolls. Then went out to grab some lunch, a birthday present for our weekly birthday party (haha) and a dessert. Then over to his brother, Dave and Amber's house for dinner. Had super fun there, I grinned through the pain and kept popping pills.

Sunday, we again lazed around and ate the rest of the cinnamon rolls..and then my walk..and then a birthday party..then Ash came home! And then the real hip pain set in. And now here we are. :) The family is trying to be nice to me and not make fun of how stupid I look when I walk..well, in reality, this isn't the first time this has happened. My hips actually despise me and do this often, just not this bad.

In the meantime I was able to get all of our laundry done, and grocery shop, get the library books returned, solve quite a few crossword puzzles, have a race down a parking lot with J (it doesn't hurt hardly at all to run..weird, right?), and go through yard sale stuff! It was a FABULOUS weekend!!!

Well, there's the update. It was a long one, huh. I have to figure out how to stop rambling so. But..then..I wouldn't be me.

Soduku Guru?

I've been working on solving puzzles in my Soduku puzzle book for about a year now.  I got through the Novice section, no problem.  Then got through the Master section with challenge, but not too much.  Now, I'm in the Guru section and can't solve them on my own for anything!  Urgg.  Are any of you Suduku masters?

And, just by the way, how DO you spell Soduku?  I find it spelled differently all over.  My book shows it as "Sudoku".  The internet shows it as "Soduku".  I've seen it with varying o's and u's.  Hmm.